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“Wilts my Soul” by Kaylin Moss

The color of my skin is Despair.
It cries a flooding river.
Screams no words, only feelings.
Feels only pain.
Despair cloakes my eyes and wilts my soul.
Murky dreary gloomy are my home.

I don’t want you to know what I feel inside,
But despite this I want to be reconciled.
Too petrified to talk,
Despair’s language is fear.
What if you don’t like what you hear?

You can’t understand what you haven’t been told.
Dad, no wonder our relationship is so cold.
Scamper off joyful mother, defiance leads the way.
There is no clean air, for I only breathe Despair.

Inside this golden egg,
Isn’t the student you treasure.
Why tarnish when you can shine?
I’m just leaving the real me behind.

Is this why I can’t breathe?
Is this the cause of my anxiety?
Despair forever surrounding me.
Bottomless pit of stomping butterflies,
The more I think about them, the more they multiply.
Not good enough, too skinny, more more more insecurities….

Wait.

I’m trying something new.
Despair, loosen your hold.
Be honest, girl, be bold.
It’s okay if your truth doesn’t fit into society’s mold.

The strength required
is already within you.
Eradicate Despair forever.

Rainbows paint the golden glistening sky,
The flood is drying up and I can see the sun.
My soul is flourishing.