Category: poems

I like turning a no into a yes.
A smile into a gasp.
A grasp of the night
And what we might let pass.
Each turn of the moon,
Lost in my swoon,
A visage of you
Enters my view.

I put on a face, a hat,
To attempt to conceal
What I’m bad at.
Affection.
I fall into love every night,
And climb out the next mourning.
Sometimes i feel like a high diver,
Gracefully spinning and twirling
In the air as I sail,
Revelling in my own overly dramatic flair.

You love everyone, too.
It’s honestly admirable considering
The fires that are bound to come when you
Heat up tinder to such extent.
The smoke obscures my view,
But the warmth remains.
Each mourning, a still
Beating heart speaks your name,
For the worse, or better.

I want to make you love me,
Up close, from afar,
I want you to miss me,
Even when I’m next to you.
I want your breath
To fog the insides of my brain.
I want you to scar my back,
Ripping my flesh, but leaving a souvenir.
I want my neighbors to hate you.

You make me flustered,
Beyond composure.
I make you laugh, and I like that.
The pearls that line your mouth
Deserve to be seen.
You said, this you can’t do.
I don’t believe you.
Again, I like turning a no into a yes.
A frown into a kiss.
An inch into a mile,
While you’re miles away
Still wondering, what if?
No one has to know,
But it will still be written on my lips.

What happened to the sky?
Fear and insecurity cover the clouds

Happiness
I hate….
You wanted the best for me

Love

What happened to the day?
Anger in the Air
We can’t breathe
You hate….
I wanted the best for you

Bliss

Where are all the children?
Lost in plain sight

Joy

I used to want the best for you
What happened to the night?
Stars under every step

Harmony

We’re not the same
Nothing changed
We used to want the best for you
We hate

Wait. Where are we?
Peace

© Copyright 2018 Matthew Mccray (3rdeyenights at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Writing.Com, its affiliates and syndicates have been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work.

लो आ गया नया ज़माना,
स्वच्छ भारत बन गया है एक बहाना ।

क्या भारत की स्वच्छता का इरादा ,
टूट रहा है यह स्वच्छ भारत का वादा ।

सैलानी हैं आते यहाँ,
दिखती है गंदगी देखें जहाँ ।

क्या वैष्णो देवी की पवित्र पहाड़ियां
लिपटी जो रहतीं हैं, बर्फीली साड़ियां
एवं मनुष्य की अपवित्रता का साथ
दया करो हम पर तो भैरवनाथ ।

इसी गंदगी का करना है अंत
तभी काम करेंगी भक्ति और मेलों में प्रभु या संत

English translation:
Here comes the New Age,
Clean India has become an excuse.

What intend India hygiene,
The broken promise of the Clean India.

Tourists come here,
See sees dirt where.

Holy Hills of what Vaishno Devi
Draped who lives, snowy sarees
And with the man’s desecration
Mercy we Bhairavnath so on.

Do the same shit end
Then work will lord saint worship and fairs

Voyaging the unknown
without a map or compass.

Chaos and disease threaten to destroy
me;
reminiscent of my ancestors stowed
below decks of ships.
Uprooted from their homeland they were
seized by men with blue eyes
and pale skin.

A slave to unwavering agony
I mourn in silence.
Haunted by karmic retribution
my plight clashes with my soul’s purpose…

Mirroring tides along the shore
it comes rushing to the surface.

Anxiety…

Self doubt…

Hopefulness…

Trauma…

Oppression…

Nostalgia…

By and by it comes and goes.

There you are, elevated on stage with the spotlight beaming down, illuminating the hairs standing up in your cowlick. Your right hand nervously cupping the microphone while you search for your content on your phone.
Where is the file
Which one should I read
Why does my phone keep locking??!!

You can’t see me- the lights in your eyes are so bright you feel you are performing in front of a black hole but you can hear the sound of my breathing, you can smell the perspiration leaking from my pores and you know I am there… waiting.

You find the stanza and nervously apologize to the black hole for making it wait, asking it silently to avoid swallowing you whole for just one more minute. As you begin to read, you find your voice shaky and the words that you wrote seemed to come from a stranger as you trip over the alliteration, trying to find the rhythm that was there at its inception.

I am now squirming in my chair. I know you can’t see me but I am holding my breath to give it to you. My sweat becomes your sweat and my heartbeat tunes to the pulsing of yours as I try to give you every ounce of calm I can offer- as if my life depends on it too.

BECAUSE IT DOES! If you fail, I fail! If you stutter and spit as you try to get the words out the way they came from your heart when you wrote them down then I am falling off that cliff too…

Second hand embarrassment- like second hand smoke- enters my lungs when you breathe it out of yours.
Just as potent, just as toxic.

I avert my eyes to my phone, scrolling through my newsfeed hoping to lessen my discomfort and to break the soul connection we have established. It doesn’t work. I can still smell your anguish coming from your armpits and hear the frightened child in your voice.

What more can I do?

I can listen to your heart
I can snap to show I hear
I can breathe until you are able to breathe on your own.
For in this moment- we are one.

As the early sunrise begins
The dew on her face glistens
She absorbs the drops with haste
Blooming, slightly, to praise God for another chance
God smiles knowing the burden on her heart
“It hurts but you are growing, my daughter.
You are different, but that’s your uniqueness!
The moment you embrace it, you will bloom.”

A dew glides down one petal; onto a leaf,
the dew continues to flow until it falls off.
an invisible force catches it and raise it.
“I know what your dew is due to…”
the force vanish, leaving a slight splash onto the soil.

“Your pain is not you. You will find a true green thumb one day, until then tend to yourself.
One already had a garden,
One didn’t want to admit they were mesmerized by you; need to learn how to love fully,
and that One,
just needed your energy to love himself,
you need One to love you as much as you give and respect what he found.
Don’t hide your dew because others aren’t strong enough to understand.
I understand, you understand, and One will one day tend to you.”

She absorbs the drops with haste,
Blooming slightly to praise God for another chance.

his eyes were like honey, rich and dazzling. I saw cracks of sunlight peeking through his irises, like the breaking of dawn shining light into the darkest part of my soul. but then, they were deep like the forest at night, and I got lost in his forest. im not sure I’ll make it back out either.
his kisses didn’t just make marks on my lips but indents on my soul, never to be replaced by another. and ever since he left, the indents get deeper by the day with intentions to absolutely break me.
his hands left traces along my body that at the time burned like fire, but now are numb when I run my own hands in the place of his.

I conform to society’s views.

I allow my emotions to dictate my destiny.

Sex is no longer a stimulant.

I drift further from the pursuit of happiness.

I distance myself from my loved ones.

Shame and I are engaged to be married.

I have cold feet while she’s content.

I don’t want to be here.

Running away is my only option.

Soft spoken and poised
Your voice cuts through the noise
The crowds a blur
I’m hanging on your every word
Filling my mind’s stanzas
Similar to seats in an arena
Between us there’s chemistry
A window into each other’s mystery
Might’ve seen her before
On a crowded street I’m sure
Walking past a diner
Watching as she turned the corner
Standing in the doorway
I just let her slip away
I should’ve done something
I shied away from saying anything
Now we’re here again
Catching up like long lost friends
God’s timing is perfect
Letting go is my only regret

Boardwalk…

                                   Street guitarist…
                                   Skate park…
                                   Graffiti artist…
      Thinking back to the days when we were young.
                 She and I were teenagers on the run.
                  Indebted to boredom and curfew
                nature would have us break the rules.
            We had each other nothing else mattered.
                                    Go-karts…
                                    Checkered flag…
                                    Dark room…
                                    Laser tag…
     Too cool for school we got caught playing hooky.
     Scared straight we were threatened with truancy.
                       She had become a nuisance.
                    They said I was a bad influence.
            Through you I found the fountain of youth.
                                  Funnel cake…
                                  Cotton candy…
                                  Center stage…
                                  Bearded lady…
            You give me the shakes like a tambourine.
            She’s on her feet saying, ” Dance with me!”
                           The night is still young.
        Glory’s ours we’ll bloom when morning comes.
                      Tomorrow’s a new destination
                             who knows whereto?

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